My child stole his teacher’s brownie. How and what came next…

Marcilieconsequences, discipline, Kind and Firm Parenting, long term parenting, Parenting w/Positive Discipline, Positive Parenting, Problem Solving, Responsibility2 Comments

Chapter 1: Mom Gets Dreaded Phone Call From School I was at work in the middle of the day when my phone began to ring. I looked down and noted the caller’s ID: it was my child’s school. Naturally, my heart began to race, butterflies fluttered in my gut, and my eyes got a bit wider. Do schools know that … Read More

Trusting your parenting intuition could be a really good thing — especially if you help it along

Marciliediscipline, Leadership, long term parenting, Parenting Intuition, Parenting w/Positive Discipline, Positive ParentingLeave a Comment

Many years ago, my mother-in-law told me that I was reading too many books about parenting. She said that I should trust my parenting intuition, because the right answers would just come to me. Her vote of confidence felt lovely…and yet, later that night, what “came to me” was a yelling match when my daughter refused to pick up her … Read More

Scripts to hold limits firmly but not sternly (with kindness and firmness at the same time)

MarcilieAuthoritative Parenting Style, discipline, Empathy, Kind and Firm Parenting, Parenting Styles, Parenting w/Positive Discipline, Positive Parenting, Setting LimitsLeave a Comment

  The idea of parenting with kindness and firmness at the same time sounded so appealing when I first heard it. But I still struggled:  what does kind and firm parenting look like, in the moment, when my child is driving me crazy and we have to get out the door? How do I hold limits firmly, but not sternly? … Read More

One way to get kids to take responsibility for their messes

MarcilieChores, discipline, Parenting w/Positive Discipline, Positive Parenting, Problem Solving, Responsibility6 Comments

Wouldn’t it be nice if children would take responsibility for cleaning up after themselves? It seems like such a basic thing; however, if you walk around my house on any given day, you might find: Dried up food bowls in the family room Cheap knick knacks from a birthday party goody bag Little bits of cut up paper, scissors and … Read More

I thought my child was being a brat. So I treated her that way. Oops.

Marcilieconsequences, discipline, Parenting w/Positive Discipline, Positive Parenting2 Comments

I thought my child was being a brat. So I treated her that way. It seemed logical at the time, but my intervention actually invited more bratty behavior. Here’s why . . . “Your explanation of your child’s behavior guides your intervention.”  — Ross Greene I will forever be transformed by having read, “The Explosive Child” by Ross Greene. Poorly … Read More

Getting on the same parenting page with your partner

JoeTLClong term parenting, Parenting and Management, Parenting w/Positive DisciplineLeave a Comment

Do you and your partner have different parenting styles?  If so, you’re in good company. It comes up all the time and I mean all the time: “How do my partner and I get onto the same parenting page?” One parent is too kind and the other too firm, and they push each other, ever farther to extremes, by compensating … Read More

My struggle to get my child to scoop the freaking litter box – part 2 in a 2-part series on agreements and follow-through

MarcilieChores, consequences, long term parenting, Parenting w/Positive DisciplineLeave a Comment

But we had an agreement! Part II: What to do when kids don’t follow through with agreements (over and over again.) I regularly turned my head when I passed it to avoid the irritation bubbling in my chest. It’s not that it was smelly or even that gross (although sometimes it was both.) It was simply a daily reminder of … Read More

Three Parenting Beliefs that Kill Your Child’s Creativity, Joy, and Potential (and How to Turn Them Around)

Marcilieconsequences, long term parenting, Parenting w/Positive DisciplineLeave a Comment

We all carry beliefs that shape our parenting behavior. Many of these beliefs were formed in early childhood and are deeply lodged into our brains. Some of these beliefs are helpful in our quest to raise kind, compassionate, resilient and responsible children. Some of these beliefs are not. These are killer beliefs because they kill creativity, potential, joy, and relationship. … Read More