When we move so quickly and expect our children to meet our fast pace, the result is that we lose patience, compassion, and connection.
Family Meetings: A Blueprint for Raising Cooperative, Kind, and Capable Kids
Family Meetings: a weekly touchpoint that will serve children for life.
3 Things That Make Sibling Conflict Worse (and what to do instead)
A little more peace at home would feel pretty good about now; so let’s take a look at how parents commonly and unknowingly make sibling rivalry worse.
How small tweaks in language can make a big difference in cooperation – a video demonstration
In this video, I demonstrate a simple and effective tool that not only invites better cooperation, but it also teaches long-term life skills and helps children develop self-efficacy (belief in self) and self-discipline.
An Essential Tool for When You “Lose It” With Your Kids
Learning to recognize when we’ve lost our cool and then take steps to calm down before reacting is one of the most important lessons I learned (and am still practicing!) from Positive Discipline.
Top 6 Positive Discipline Tools for Preschoolers and Toddlers
I’ve been through it three times and the thought of doing it again feels absolutely exhausting: parenting toddlers and preschoolers. It’s true that the teen years present some emotionally exhausting issues (and I mean seriously exhausting), but those early years wore me out in all dimensions: physical, emotional, and cognitive. Why were my car keys in the refrigerator? Because I … Read More
How Positive Discipline (and a chore chart) followed my son to college
I visited my son at college last weekend. A sophomore in off-campus housing, he’d been complaining about the standards of cleanliness among his roommates (in his view, the standards are quite low.) For the first time in my son’s life, there is no one other than the 4 guys who live there to clean up the messes, dishes, or bathrooms. … Read More
Don’t take sides when siblings fight!
I’ve heard it said that when siblings fight, the parent or caregiver should first attend to the victim by giving comfort and attention. This way, bullies aren’t rewarded with attention, and theoretically, they learn to never to repeat the behavior because they actually see the pain they’ve caused. This seems logical enough…but in the long term, deciding who’s right and … Read More
How parenting with a long-term view can transform behavior
While parenting with a long-term view (“long-term parenting”) can completely transform a situation and a relationship, I’ve struggled for years (literally) with how to write about it. I think it might sound a bit boring, and imply that one might not get immediate answers with its practice. Am I right? I imagine readers asking, How will long-term parenting help me … Read More
My child stole his teacher’s brownie. How and what came next…
Chapter 1: Mom Gets Dreaded Phone Call From School I was at work in the middle of the day when my phone began to ring. I looked down and noted the caller’s ID: it was my child’s school. Naturally, my heart began to race, butterflies fluttered in my gut, and my eyes got a bit wider. Do schools know that … Read More
Staying cool, calm, and curious in the face of really irritating behavior . . .
It was Monday night, I was sick, and my husband had been out of town for the long weekend. He arrived home in the evening, intending to stay just long enough to print out tickets for a Warriors game (one his few indulgences, which I am happy he takes) and then go. Our 7 year-old, M, was not happy … Read More
7 Tips for Peaceful Holiday Parenting
As the holidays approach, I thought it would be a good time to share some quick tips that make it easier to parent with peace and actually enjoy holiday family time. I’m noticing that I feel a much greater sense of calm heading into the season and I think it’s because I’ve finally taken many of these tips to heart. … Read More